Leica 2

1 comments:

Mélanie Daigle said...

NICE WORK on the changing of the memory sequence! Best attempt yet, it really reads!

I think that we should see the old lady and the kid baking together for the hand slap to work. Right now it's like, "where did the dog go, and how's that kid?". Also, during this bit I picture Ms. Ecks looking more bored/annoyed than angry when she's pulls out her "smoke".

I like the adjustment for the ending. I think I agree with Tony that the fall seems to affect the flow of the story though, what does the rest of the group think?